


Flskhu

by Quilna



Category: Gravity Falls, Supernatural
Genre: Bill Cipher Being Bill Cipher, Demonic Possession, Gen, Humor, Self-Harm
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-08-01
Updated: 2015-08-01
Packaged: 2018-04-12 02:27:20
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,361
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4461836
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Quilna/pseuds/Quilna
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>
  <em> The sun was shining, the birds were chirping and not a single cloud hung in the sky. It was a perfect, warm Summer day. It felt like the kind of day where nothing could go wrong...</em>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p> </p>
<p> </p>
<p><em>-So of course it was this day that Dean dropped himself down the stairs. </em><br/>△</p>
            </blockquote>





	Flskhu

**Author's Note:**

> The title is cipher in code (I think. I'm not good at figuring out codes)  
> I would also like to point out that if Bill and Dipper is Bipper then that makes Bill and Dean Bean. This isn't relevant to the plot, I just thought it was funny. (Sam and Bill would be Bam)

The sun was shining, the birds were chirping and not a single cloud hung in the sky. It was a perfect, warm Summer day. It felt like the kind of day where nothing could go wrong, the kind of day that seemed almost impossible to mess up. There was probably a lot of people hanging out on the beach or having a picnic in the park, smiling and laughing in the sunshine. It was a day when even the most introverted would open at least one curtain or window in the house to enjoy the warmth and light.

A perfect, bright, warm Summer day...

-So of course it was this day that Dean dropped himself down the stairs.

Sam was eating his breakfast when he heard the loud banging coming from the stairs. He slowly put the spoon down and swallowed his mouthful of cereal. He honestly wasn't in the mood for this but (after a few minutes of consideration and repeated banging from the stairs) he still stood up and went to investigate.

Dean had already moved from the stairs and was busy flicking through the many bookcases in the bunker, humming what sounded like some weird old music while lightly bobbing in time to the song and tapping his foot while grinning from ear to ear.

Sam just stood there, unsure whether he even wanted to get involved this early in the morning - and on such a nice day too.

Dean was the first to speak, glancing up from his browsing and spotting Sam there. He stopped humming and paused for a second before his grin seemed to grow impossibly wider.

"Oh, heya Plaid Brother No 2" He sang a little too cheerfully.

Sam cleared his throat awkwardly, "Uh... Hey?"

"Howa you this morning?" He asked in a mock American accent then cleared his throat and stopped the accent like he had suddenly realized how bad it was then, speaking normally... Which was a normal American accent anyway, "Fine day, right?"

"Mhm" Sam agreed, still unsure of his willingness to bother with this, "How... How about you..?"

"Oh, great! The sun is burning in a fiery ball of death and possibly giving some innocent kid sunstroke and the birds are screaming bloody murder at each other. How could such a day be any better?"

"Not exactly how I would put it but sure" Sam sighed and reached for the holy water.

Dean nodded with a little bob of his head like a bird before turning back to the books.

"What are you looking for?" He asked, casually unscrewing the flask.

"A red journal about yey high and this wide" He gestured the sizes with his hands, "Basically book sized, unsurprisingly. It also has a gold hand on the front with the number 1. Six fingers."

"Mm" The top was screwed on tighter than expected and he was having a bit of trouble undoing it.

"You need help there, moose?"

Sam started and went red, "N-no! I'm fine. Not moose by the way"

"Yeah, yeah. I could tell that by the lack of antlers. What's the plural of moose anyway? Meese? Mooses?" Dean frowned thoughtfully and then said in a voice barely a whisper, "Over a million years and omnipotence and I still don't know that one. Does anyone know? Does the plural even exist?"

With a pop, the lid finally came unstuck. Sam tossed the holy water at Dean. It hissed in a coil of steam and Dean flinched but his grin didn't falter, instead he giggled like it had tickled him.

"That feels good, got any more of that stuff?"

Sam's eyes widened. He wasn't used to a demon like this. He could see now by Dean's eyes that it wasn't like any demon he'd seen before. Dean's eyes had started glowing faintly yellow and the pupils had become vertical slits like a snake.

Dean - or whatever the hell this thing was - burst out laughing so hard that tears streamed down his face.

"Your face!" He gasped through the laughter, wiping away the tears, "You look like a rabbit in the headlights just before the car hits it!"

"What are you?"

"A demon, duh. What do you want, a prize? I have a screaming head for sale if you want it. All out of inspirational stickers through so if you want one of those then you'll have to wait"

"What kind of demon though?"

"Well, people seem to refer to me as the triangle demon or Dorito . There was an entire cult that called me the Illuminati. Weirdoes."

"Triangle demon? Never heard of it"

"Oh, no, I haven't gotten to that yet. I'm a dream demon although I would enjoy to be referred to as "the almighty demon overlord of the land of dreams and memories where no secret can be hid or dirty thought can be disguised" but you can call me a dream demon for short. I would also like to remind you that I am not a real Dorito and anyone caught licking me will be sentenced to dying in a hundred thousand ways all at once while being forced to watch the most dull, essence sucking, black and white romance film I can find"

"Uh, ok dream demon can-"

"Oh, call me Bill. Bill Cipher"

"...Sure... Bill Cipher... Can you get out of my brother's body please?"

"Just a sec. I haven't found what I was looking for yet. You still haven't answered my question by the way"

"What question?"

"What the hell is the plural of moose?"

"Uh, I think it's just moose"

"One moose, a herd of moose" Bill mused, "It just doesn't sound right. Meese on the other hand..."

"What do you even want this book for anyway?"

Bill tapped the side of his nose mysteriously, "You'll see... Or maybe you won't. You know, I'm not even sure if that book is here"

Sam hesitated and watched as Bill checked a few more books. He was unsure whether to stop him or..?

"Ok. It's not here. Wrong dimension. I suppose your name isn't Jared is it?"

"Jared? Who's J- Wait! Isn't that the guy from that alternative universe where-"

Bill put a finger to Sam's lips, gently and leaned in until they were staring eye to eye and whispered sweetly "I don't care" before moving away sharply.

Sam stood there for a second, blinking and frowning as he tried to figure out what the heck just happened.

"Anyways. See ya around, Moose" Dean's body suddenly crumpled to the floor in an ungraceful heap as Bill exited.

"Dean! Dean!"

Dean groaned and opened his eyes, blinking in confusion.

"Dean? It's you, right?"

"I feel like I've been run over by a truck" Dean just muttered, curling into a ball on the floor, "What the hell did Bill do with my body?"

"I think you fell down the stairs"

"How many times?"

"I lost count"

"And how long did it take you to help?"

"Umm..."

"God dammit, Sammy"

"Look, it's a nice day, I only just woke up and I think we've dealt with enough recently. I wasn't in the mood for a demonically possessed brother using the stairs as a slide"

"I suppose it's partly my fault"

"Hm?"

"I gave consent for him to possess my body by accident"

"How?"

"He said he could make me annoy you. I said prove it"

Sam snorted.

"This is not funny!"

"How'd he even get in?"

"Weren't you listening? Dream demon. I met him in a dream. He's a frickin' one eyed triangle with a top hat and bow tie, Sam. A triangle!"

"So you were watching?"

"Watching? Of course I was watching! He was in my body!"

"I wish I knew what he was doing with Jared"

Dean smirked, "At least that's one good thing to imagine. I wish I could see that"

Sam smiled and turned to get back to breakfast. Dean sat there for a while, thinking. Who was Bill? What did he want with this journal so badly?

"I guess I'll never know" He muttered aloud and then went to have his own breakfast, ignoring the bruises and possibly sprained leg.


End file.
